feeling so low

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Penny Odel

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hi, i have had 2 disc ops so far L4/L5 and L4/S1 after the last op approx 10 months ago i fell over because my foot is numb from op 1 and does not always go in the correct direction anyway i fell on to my left shoulder and now have a shoulder imingement oh boy is this painful i also have flashes of numbness down my left leg and unbelievable pain in my left toes ,i have also had sciatica down my right leg which is now getting unbearable, thankfully iam seeing my consultant this week , iam hoping i do not need another op but feel like i do need at least 2 not to mention the surgery iam waiting for on my shoulder, i was taking oromorph but was so low i thought i was going to commit suicide but the gp did nothing and let me walk out crying saying i was going to kill myself, i thought its either help myself or just end it luckily i decided to stop the oromorph and obviously i have more pain but my state of my mind is slightly better, sorry for the ramble but i feel quite lonely at the moment and cannot see an end to all this pain.
 
Hi bmw1

Firstly - a big

I don't have any practical advice about your pain (sorry) but I wanted you to know that I am thinking of you and you are not alone - you've got HP now!!!

I hope your consultant has some answers - but your GP sounds crap - feeling for you - can't you go to another GP? You obviously can't go on like this & at the very least need someone sympathetic to your pain & emotional distress.

Would you like me to send you some Reiki &/or Crystal Healing?

Monica x
 
Hi BMW1

Please understand you are not alone. I too have felt very desperate at times with my back problems (I have posted quite a bit so won't bore you with details) and my GP has put me on an antidepressant which has helped so much. He also has offered counselling which I am considering at the moment. Please go and see a different Gp or if he is the only one available insist he does a depression score on you, it's like a mini questionnaire, it will determine whether you need antidepressants or not. A good GP will then monitor you and make you do the questionnaire every few months to check for improvement or worsening symptoms.

As a back pain sufferer I know how you are feeling and I agree there are times when I also would like my left leg chopped off, mainly at night when desperate for sleep and my leg won't stop jumping and twitching. I have a great husband to listen to me, but if you are alone and desperate the Samaritans are very good listeners and sometimes just getting stuff off your chest helps.

Please keep in touch with me and let me know how you are doing, take care Wend x
 
thanks for the replies, i have seen all the gp's at my practice and i have done the deppression questionaire and scored 10 on most of them but still they pass the buck saying wait till you see the specialist, i to think anti depressants would help but with all the pain killers iam taking i think they are afraid to give me anymore drugs, so its just take 1 day at a time, i go to bed at 6pm every night and watch tv there as its the only place i can get some relief from the agonising pain , i feel sorry for hubby as he also had L4/L5 done a few years ago and he also suffers from spasms in his leg, and because iam in so much pain i don't feel very sociable at the moment so we do not go out apart from shopping which is done as quick as possible then back home, some days my legs feel like jelly and i feel like its too much effort to walk, i guess thats maybe the depression.
 
I can't believe your GP is not taking your depression seriously. I don't think it's to do with the amount of tablets as I take 27 tablets a day plus oramorph every four to six hours. My consultant had nothing to do with my depression, but maybe yours will, when are you due to be seen?

I also spend a lot of time in bed, most days from 2pm on other than to come down to eat tea. Now my family come to me upstairs, many times there have been three or four of us on the bed watching a DVD. The up side I have found also is that my three children can come and have a bit of mum time on their own.

This would be my only advice, try and see the positives in a situation. I would love to go to a shop but only attend medical appointments, but this saves us a fortune on my impulse buying

Please keep in touch, it does help talking to another sufferer. Take care Wend x
 
thanks wend its nice to know iam not alone, iam seeing consultant for my back today after 10 month wait since last op ,but i know how it will go he will say we will get an mri and see whats happening , thats fair enough but that will be about a 3 month wait then if iam unlucky and need another op then it will be about another 8 months on waiting list, the thought of another year like this is almost unbearable, we have a new grandson the first but i cannot hold him for fear of dropping him because of my shoulder impingment and back pain, i think at night the nerve pain is the worst it makes you feel like chopping your toes off the pain is so bad iam on highest dose of pregablin but that does not seem to be working anymore, and have tried gabapentin but did not get on well with that one so will have to see if there is anything else he can suggest, take care helen x
 
Good luck with your appointment today. I left a message earlier on another post about the length of time all these things take. I can't believe 2 1/2 years have gone by and I am still not better. My last son goes off to uni in September and me and my hubby always said we would travel the world once they had all gone, now I struggle to travel to a docs appt. Make sure the consultant understands how desperate you are, you never know it might make a difference. I am not very good at this I hate showing emotions or getting upset so do the good old british stiff upper lip thing

Let me know how it goes. Take care Wend xxx
 
hi, i had my appointment yesterday with the consultant and as expected he is sending me for an mri scan , but he thinks my problem is scar tissue which he cannot do anything about at the moment, iam like you wend i do not like showing emotion it makes me feel weak ,but i explained how bad things were and he's writing to gp and he wants me to see pain clinic but i know there is a huge waiting list for that and i will not have the epidural that they will inevitabley recommend ( too much of a baby for that) so no further forward at moment.
 
hi i have read the entire string and really feel bad for the kind of pain you are in. having had back ache, sciatica and what nots for a very long time i can totally empathise with you.
one of the best cures i found and the reason i am upright today and functioning normally (12yrs now) is due to acupressure, it really does work miracles and is non invasive.

also get an amethyst ball and massage over the painful areas away from the body. will help with the pain and aid in tissue healing.

you can also use rhus tox mother tincture, (its homeopathic), apply a few drops on the painful spot or area and gently massage in and then keep area warm. not only will it reduce pain significantly but will also start deep tissue repair. (you may want to do a spot test before you apply to a larger area for allergy or reaction, though i find homeopathic medicines very safe).

you can also learn the pain mudras which you can to a few times a day.

if you need any more clarifications please do not hesitate to contact me.
thinking of you and sending a healing prayer for you.
love
 
Dear BMW1,

I feel for you, as I am currently suffering from a bad back incident from 3 weeks ago.. but lucky for me , after two visits to the A&E, 1 osteo app.. and 3 different GP visits ..I have found a GP that actually took the time and trouble to vet me out fully.. not only did she listen patiently to the full history before scribbling away any medication..but her examination was very detailed.. and she has now like you referred me to MRI scan soon.. I felt so hopeful with her..

She has given me Naproxen 500mg (strong painkiller) but also Lansoprazole to coat the stomach lining due to how strong Naproxen is.. then a prescription for a local analgesic cream to rub on , as well as yup you guessed it : 2mg per daily Diazepam for a week just to relax my muscles as well as to lift my spirit up a bit no doubt as I was in floods of tears with pain when I saw her..

I know different GP vary drastically.. and I don't plan on being on these medication for long ..already I am halving the tablets to regain self control and pain management.. but to me she was a God sent when i was in agony ..and unable to move!!

It took 3 useless and unempathetic to get to where i am today.. please don't lose hope..

You can also get this local analgesic cream without prescription."Algesal " . it will cost you ยฃ4.55 or there about.. get that..that's a start.. eat Turkey, ripe banana , and capsicum in your daily diet to boost your natural serotonin production..so your depression will be kept at bay..

But please please remember you do need a proper diagnosis and treatment so ..apart from the natural things you can do and try out.. keep with the doctors till you are sorted.. get someone to go with you.. if at times you lack the strength to fight your case .. also for moral support..

Good luck with it all..

With all my best wishes to your speedy recovery

Vathani X
 
Hi again
Let's hope the MRI can give you some answers. Have you had a discectomy and a fusion? I have had three epidurals and I have to say I found them to be only mildly uncomfortable, no worse than having a blood test, and much better than dentist injections. We all have different pain thresholds and to my mind when you have learnt to deal with back pain for a long time anything else is a breeze. I attend the pain clinic and the idea is to try and help you learn to live with your pain not get rid of it. This is done by keeping a diary to start with to see if there are any triggers, in my case just getting up more or less does it . They will then teach you coping techniques ie distraction, relaxation, deep breathing etc. For me the best thing they have helped with is on getting me the correct aids for my house, which I didn't know I could get free. My wait to see them was 3 1/2 months, so know about the wait very frustrating.

Keep in touch on how the MRI goes. Hope you are feeling a little better mood wise, but as my GP said Friday it is a huge adjustment coping with the disabilities our backs can cause and we are allowed to have days when all we do is cry. I am now taking up his offer of counselling so will let you know if helpful.

Take care Wend x
 
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    GOLDEN FS โ€“ 8380 Kennedy Rd ๐Ÿ“ž 905-258-0777 / 416-688-6886 ๐Ÿ‡ป๐Ÿ‡ณ CICI, ๐Ÿ‡ฎ๐Ÿ‡ณ SONIA (2PM), ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡พ AMY ๐Ÿ”Ž View Schedule: bit.ly/flowers_schedule ๐Ÿ›Ž๏ธ Booking Now: bit.ly/bookinggoldenlove
  32. FLOWER Spa - BLUEXADO | Thornhill | VAUGHAN:
    BLUEXADO FS โ€“ #06-1102 Centre St ๐Ÿ“ž 416-357-9797 / 416-678-8668 ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ด MEGAN, ๐Ÿ‡ป๐Ÿ‡ณ MY LINH, ๐Ÿ‡ป๐Ÿ‡ณ JULIE ๐Ÿ”Ž View Schedule: bit.ly/flowers_schedule ๐Ÿ›Ž๏ธ Booking Now: bit.ly/bookingbluexadolove
  33. FLOWER Spa โ€“ PINK | Scarborough | TORONTO:
    PINK FS โ€“ 3300 McNicoll Ave ๐Ÿ“ž 416-299-5515 / 416-817-3839 ๐Ÿ‡ฎ๐Ÿ‡ท ELINA, ๐Ÿ‡ป๐Ÿ‡ณ KELLY, ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ฌ CANDY (12PM) ๐Ÿ”Ž View Schedule: bit.ly/flowers_schedule ๐Ÿ›Ž๏ธ Booking Now: bit.ly/bookingpinklove
  34. Golden Sunshine Spa:
    โœจClick on our Username and FOLLOW US for updates and special services ! โœ… Click Here Today๐ŸŒธAkame๐ŸŒธChristina๐ŸŒธXuka๐ŸŒธLynda๐ŸŒธMilly Call us โ˜Ž 905 - 265 - 2158โ˜Ž๏ธ Your ultimate service awaits! โœจ
  35. Soul Relax Spa:
    โœจ Looking for a relaxing escape? โœ… Click Here Meet๐ŸŒธTina๐ŸŒธIsabella๐ŸŒธMonikaCall us today for the best treatment and service experience. Click on our Username and FOLLOW US for updates ! Call now โ˜Ž 289 - 298 - 5662โ˜Ž๏ธ Your ultimate relaxation awaits! โœจ
  36. SL East Spa:
    ๐Ÿ’†โ€โ™€๐Ÿ’–WooHoo Wed๐Ÿ’– Ultimate destination for Asian massages๐ŸŽ‰ Two fab spots: Richmond Hill & Oakvilleโœจ Your passport to paradise with 10 enchanting girls fr China, HK, Japan & Korea โ€” ๐Ÿ†•Luna, Cindy, Coco,Cici, Jenny, Amber, JPN Yui, Akino, Jasmine & Lucyโ€” ready to pamper you๐ŸŽ๐Ÿ Ring us ๐Ÿ“ž647-695-6354 or text us ๐Ÿ“ฑ647-578-8169โœจ 160 East Beaver Cr., Unit 12, RichmondHill ๐Ÿ’ฐWhere Eastern charm meets Western comfort - your bliss awaits๐Ÿ™Œ
  37. Lulu1980:
    Phoenix Blossom Spa ๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒน2 girls ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ5124 Dundas St W Etobicokeโ˜Ž๏ธ416-817-3366๐Ÿ‘ Table Shower Sea Salt Bath Body Scrub๐Ÿ˜˜ Japanese girl Nina โค๏ธ Natural Big Boobs 38 DD ๐Ÿ˜˜Pink Mini Nipples Hot body slide, super enjoyable๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜ very provocative service๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜, professional super Luna deep tissue massage, has therapeutic effect to loosen bones and relieve muscle pressure and will bring you unexpected service effects, she will bring you a little surprise๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜โค๏ธYou are welcome to make an appoint
  38. SpringGreen.:
    Today we have 5 girls on downtown Toronto 72 gerrard st west๏ผš๐Ÿ’‹๐Ÿ’‹ New girl gaga Serving The Queen ๐Ÿ’‹๐Ÿ’‹Bunny- Tanned Spanish beauty with large melons and a fun booty too Wendy- exotic goddess with a gymnasts body and corresponding flexibility Jennifer- Exotic beauty with... Call and text 647 891 0699 ask questions Thanks ๐Ÿ’‹๐Ÿ’‹
  39. Jennyโ€™s Spa:
    ๐ŸŽ‰๐Ÿ’JENNYโ€™S SPA๐ŸŽ‰๐Ÿ’ โœ…5170 DUNDAS STREET WESTโœ… ๐Ÿ‘ŒETOBICOKE ONTARIO M9A 1C4๐Ÿ‘Œ โ˜Ž๏ธ( 647-893-5196)โ˜Ž๏ธCall or Text โ˜Ž๏ธ( 437-888-3759)โ˜Ž๏ธCall Only (ETOBICOKE) OPEN 10am to 9pm MONDAY to SUNDAY ๐Ÿ”ฅโœ…GRAND OPENING๐Ÿ’ฏNEW GIRLS EVERYDAY๐Ÿ”ฅEXCELLENT MASSAGE + SERVICE QUEENS NOW AVAILABLE AT JENNYโ€™S SPA FOR ALL YOUR MASSAGE AND SPECIAL EXTRA NEEDS๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ’ฏ๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ”ฅโค๏ธ๐Ÿ‘Œ ๐Ÿ”ฅTWO BEAUTIFUL NEW YOUNG ASIAN GIRLS EVERYDAY๐Ÿ”ฅ ๐Ÿ’ฏREAL PICTURES OF ATTENDANTS๐Ÿ’ฏ ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ’‹Limited Time Special Promotion๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ’‹ โœ…๐Ÿ’ฆ30 Minutes Nude Mass
  40. Red Rose Spa:
    ๐ŸŒธ We have 5 hot brown girls today ๐ŸŒธ MONICA, PAOLA, MALIYA, MONIKA, AMANDA, ASHA, JAZMINE, PREETI, ANGELINA, KIRAN ๐ŸŒธ 2588 Birchmount ๐ŸŒธ 2 Invergordon ๐ŸŒธ 647-702-8800 ๐ŸŒธ Please visit for a great erotic massage
  41. wilson holistic centre:
    ๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•Beautiful Korean girl working at 382 Wilson Ave ๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•โ˜Ž๏ธโ˜Ž๏ธ416-840-0071โค๏ธโค๏ธ
  42. wonderspa:
    ๐ŸŒบWonder spa,(9421Jane st unit127)call416-5000-800โ˜Ž๏ธbest massage in vaughan,Wednesday RMT available,๐Ÿ’„sexy face young girl Joey natural c cup,very good looking nice body slide,really popular ๐ŸŽlong hair Q Lucy good strong to relax oil massage, Relieve pain and remove stress,more experience,๐ŸŒนvery nice new girl CiCi, amazing the end,give you warm time,must try๐ŸŒน๐Ÿฅค
  43. AliceSpa:
    WEDNESDAY at ๐—”๐—Ÿ๐—œ๐—–๐—˜ ๐—ฆ๐—ฃ๐—” 416-298-0898, 4915 Steeles Ave. E, Scarborough 3 very nice girls here today. Open 10am to 9pm: CLOUDIA (11am-8pm): is Vietnamese, young, petite 5'2" & 96 Lbs, B Cup, best rim deep bbbj cim. $40 Room Fee + $80 (incl bbbj & fs). +$20 for rim/cim. Excellent open minded services. DORIS (12pm-9pm): from Taiwan, is young & petite with loing thick black hair, 105 Lbs
  44. Annie Spa:
    ๐Ÿ’‹๐Ÿ˜˜Sexy Petite Korean๐Ÿ‡ฐ๐Ÿ‡ทGirl Eva working with Sweet Beautiful Japanese New Cummer to Canada Feifei ๐Ÿ‡ฏ๐Ÿ‡ต and Sensual Pleasing Busty Coco๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ณtoday๐Ÿ’‹๐Ÿ˜˜Call or text ๐Ÿ“ฒ647-891-9688 or 416-291-8879๐Ÿ“ฒ
  45. EMSpa_schedule:
    Hey! Where have you been? Today (Wednesday), our amazing attendants are Carla โ€, Cici ๐Ÿ˜, Opal ๐Ÿคฉ, Sandy ๐Ÿค— and Yoyo ๐Ÿ˜. Call us at โ˜Ž๏ธ (905) 479-6668 โ˜Ž๏ธ to book your favourite and head on over to 7665 Kennedy Road, Unit 4, Markham!
  46. ForeverWarden:
    Wednesday at ๐Ÿซฆโค๏ธ๐Ÿ”ด๐ŸŸฅโ™พ๏ธ๐“•๐“ž๐“ก๐“”๐“ฅ๐“”๐“ก ๐“ข๐“Ÿ๐“โ™พ๏ธ๐ŸŸฅ๐Ÿ”ดโค๏ธ๐Ÿซฆ2190 Warden Ave, Unit 201, Scarborough ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿญ๐Ÿฒ-๐Ÿด๐Ÿฌ๐Ÿฌ-๐Ÿณ๐Ÿด๐Ÿด๐Ÿณ: Bella, Cindy & Sasa. Bella is around 5โ€™3โ€ with a thin to medium build, C Cups, and a pleasing personality. She can offer dfk, bbbj and cfs as well as a good massage experience. Cindy is a slim beauty, 5โ€™4โ€, natural C Cups. Her massage is nice, her services will drive you wild & her finish is a dream
  47. HolidaySpa:
    Wednesday at ๐ŸŒด๐Ÿ˜Ž๐ŸŒ…๐“—๐“ธ๐“ต๐“ฒ๐“ญ๐“ช๐”‚ ๐“ข๐“น๐“ช๐ŸŒ…๐Ÿ˜Ž๐ŸŒด3517 Kennedy Rd, Unit 4, Scarborough โ˜Ž๏ธ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿฏ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿฎ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿญ๐Ÿญ๐Ÿต๐Ÿตโ˜Ž๏ธ: FIONA, KIKI & CINDY. FIONA is a slim hottie with long dark hair, great melons and ass, and nice services. Kiki is very attractive, young, about 5โ€™4โ€ and 110 Lbs., slim with a banging body. Kiki is very popular for her great attitude and services. CINDY is slim & incredibly sexy
  48. SugarLoveSpa:
    Wednesday at โค๏ธ๐Ÿ’™ ๐Ÿ’œโŽ๐—ฆ๐—จ๐—š๐—”๐—ฅ ๐—Ÿ๐—ข๐—ฉ๐—˜ ๐—ฆ๐—ฃ๐—”โŽ ๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’—๐Ÿ’˜: SARAH, SUSAN, TIFFANY & VIVI. 1270 Finch Ave W (at Keele St), Unit 18. North York, ON โ˜Ž ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿฏ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿฏ๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿฑ-๐Ÿฎ๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿด๐Ÿด โ˜Ž SARA is a beautiful Thai lady with C Cups, 160 Cms and 50 Kgs, with a full set of services to delight you. SUSAN is a small, slim & sexy Latina girl, 5'4" & 116 Lbs, with nice boobs and ass, very versatile services.
  49. ใ™ใฟใพใ›ใ‚“:
    Top notch line up with superstars like sunny , gabby , elena , kiki , Ella and cindy. At top notch wellness
  50. bnwellness_wilson:
    We have 4 young girls are working today, young Taiwanese Victoria slime 26โ€™s and young flirty Mia 25โ€™s with curly body , pretty Ella and cute GFE Lina are providing deep tissue massage, pls call 4163985777 book appointment and walk in always welcome,back entrance and parking available, 350 Wilson Ave North York
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